Female Archetypes of Sex & Love Addiction

Do you recognize your behavior or that of someone you care about in these archetypes?

Dying for Love: Lucy the Love Addict

You have likely encountered her: She is dying for love. Always on the hunt for Mr. Right, her eyes scan every crowd looking for him wherever she goes. Unable to tolerate dinner or a movie out alone, and unwilling to go places or attend events unless available men will be there, she stays home alone a lot … but searches online. When out, Lucy’s made up and ready for a date whether at the Laundromat or picking up a few things at the corner store. You never know, he could be there — the man who will make everything okay. The one who will finally make her feel whole.   Read more about Lucy the Love Addict >

Risky Business: Dora Danger Girl

This is the friend you worry about. You wonder how she doesn’t end up in the hospital or on the late-night news. She doesn’t seem the least bit afraid of hooking up with strangers, even those she just met online. When it comes to sex and intimate relationships she takes a typical male role. Much like the character Samantha in Sex in the City, Dora has all the sex she wants and that’s just how she likes it. No one gets too close; no one can really hurt Dora.  Read more about Dora Danger Girl >

The Horny Housewife: Suzy Soccer Mom

There are rumors floating around about her. She lives down the street. You see her at PTA meetings. You can’t believe it’s true, but everyone says it is: the housewife who drinks too much and has sex with her “massage therapist.” It’s only a matter of time before her oblivious husband figures it out. Read more about Suzy Soccer Mom >

The Empty Nester: Connie Cougar

She gave everything to raising her family, but now the kids are grown and her husband has moved on in pursuit of a younger woman. She’s all alone now and isn’t it time she had a little fun for herself? A combination of Botox and exercise leave her feeling desirable again; she never thought anyone would still want her, but they do – often. Online dating seems so easy – she’s meeting lots of men, younger men, and she’s having so much fun (and lots of sex), but she keeps her dating life secret because it embarrasses her. At some point she asks herself: What am I really looking for? Read more about Connie Cougar >

All or Nothing: Betty Binger

She jokes with friends that now that she’s found “him” she doesn’t need to worry as much about her appearance, but then she gains so much weight that he stops wanting to have sex with her. She hates herself anyway, so she is relieved to be able to avoid intimacy. As soon as the relationship ends, Betty begins to furiously diet and exercise; once the weight is off she’s back to being indiscriminately promiscuous with a number of different men, some complete strangers to her. She feels good staying thin, lithe, and hot waiting for the right guy to come along, but as soon as he does, the pattern repeats and this lovely, playful young woman begins to eat herself back into obesity.  Read more about Betty Binger >

Thirteenth Stepping: Rita Relapser

Her friends and family can’t understand it. How many times do they have to pay for her to go to rehab before she stops her self-destructive patterns? Over and over she’s sworn this time she’s really serious. Then she drinks again – sometimes until she passes out. Her twelve-step group friends warn her she needs to stop going to meetings just to find men for sex, especially in the first year of sobriety. But she can’t and won’t stop because being alone, even for a few days or weeks, is just too much to tolerate. Read more about Rita Relapser >

Bad Boys: Penny the Party Girl

She didn’t come from a bad family, but they weren’t big on being involved in her life. She’s always been a bit of a party girl, and since no one was really watching that closely it was easy and just so much more fun to get involved with the bad boys. She isn’t really going anywhere with her life. It’s all just partying: sex, drugs, alcohol, and more sex. A wake-up call makes her realize she’s headed nowhere fast. Read more about Penny the Party Girl >

Over the Borderline: Narcissist Nancy

Her mood depends on how the men in her life are treating her and swings from madly obsessed to utterly over it. At first she idolizes a man, then quickly discovers his flaws and devalues or discards him. If he dumps her first the rejection feels intolerable and she will then hound him to make her understand: What is wrong with me? How can I change to make you happy? Read more about Narcissist Nancy>





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